Among the many characteristics that grow a healthy relationship, five markers stand out as foundationally significant. These qualities, lived imperfectly of course, are needed to live in healthy relationship. They are not demands to be placed on the other person. They are opportunities for our own growth. The last of the foundational characteristics is a process view of living.
We must grow throughout life; we never get control of it. No one has all the answers, so we all need to be good at the question: “How do I do this?”
This is everyone’s first time through life. We always need to learn the next step. Twenty year olds need 30 year olds; 50 year olds need 70 year olds. And vice versa. We all need each other as guides. Being able to need others, especially God, is the way to live the lives we seek.
It really does take a lifetime to learn how to live. We need to grow in the day we are living, with our faces set towards where we hope to go in the future.
The five foundational characteristics that we need to live in healthy relationship are significant because we are created for relationship. We will not have the lives we seek without facing how we are created and live accordingly, flaws and all.
The five characteristics make room for others to trust us, want to be with us, and to be close to us. We need:
3. Respect for Differences
4. Relentless Self-Focus
5. Process View of Living